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Four friends of different ages walking arm in arm along a stone street at dusk, one carrying flowers

Together · 30 min · For caregivers

A circle of people nearby

When you live far from an ageing parent, a short list of people close to them is the safety net you cannot be.

30 minutesFrom the library, free to readFour steps
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Caring from a distance comes with a particular worry: what if something happens and nobody knows. You cannot be there every day, but you can know who is. A small circle of people near your parent, written down and in touch, makes the distance feel less wide.

The steps

Four small steps,in your own time.

  1. With your parent, list the people who live near them or see them often: neighbours, friends, a faith or social group, the pharmacy, a regular shopkeeper.

  2. Ask your parent who they would be happy for you to contact, and respect their answer.

  3. Get in touch with two or three of them, introduce yourself, and swap phone numbers. Ask one if they would be willing to hold a spare key.

  4. Keep the list with your parent's other papers and on your phone, and send a short thank-you message to the circle now and then.

The reason

Why it helps

Most help in an emergency comes from people who are close by, not from family far away. Knowing who those people are, and having already spoken to them, means a call can be made quickly when it matters. It also gives your parent more connection in their own neighbourhood, which matters for its own sake.

A gentle variation

If your parent is private and does not want neighbours involved, start with one person they already trust, or with a local service that offers regular calls or visits for older people.

One hand resting over another on a wooden table

WE · TRIBE

Try itwith someone.

If there are brothers, sisters or cousins, share the list between you, so everyone knows who to call and nobody does it twice.

Make it a plan in HIVELIVE, with WE

Try it today

Today, ask your parent the name of one neighbour or friend nearby who they would be happy for you to contact.

Add it to your day

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