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Four friends of different ages walking arm in arm along a stone street at dusk, one carrying flowers

Together · 20 min

A help list for the first weeks

Before the baby comes, write down the jobs other people can do, so that when they ask how they can help, you have an answer.

20 minutesFrom the library, free to readFour steps
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People love to say: let me know if there is anything I can do. In the first weeks after a birth, it can be hard to think of anything at all. A list written beforehand, while you have the energy, turns kind offers into real help.

The steps

Four small steps,in your own time.

  1. During pregnancy, sit down for twenty minutes and write a list of everyday jobs: meals, shopping, laundry, school runs, walking the dog, putting the bins out.

  2. Next to each one, write the name of someone who might like to do it. Think of neighbours and friends as well as family.

  3. Ask them now, gently, and tell them it is fine to say no. Most people are glad to have one clear job.

  4. Keep the list on the fridge or in a shared message, so when someone offers, you can point to it rather than think.

The reason

Why it helps

The first weeks with a new baby are tiring for everyone, especially after a difficult birth or if you are also caring for others. Small jobs done by other people leave you more time to rest, recover and get to know your baby. Asking ahead also makes it easier to accept help when the time comes.

A gentle variation

If you do not have many people nearby, ask your midwife, health visitor or doctor about local support, such as parent groups or community services. Some places also have volunteers who help new families.

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WE · TRIBE

Try itwith someone.

Write the list with your partner or a close friend. They may think of jobs you have forgotten, and they can be the one who keeps track of who is doing what.

Make it a plan in HIVELIVE, with WE

Try it today

This week, write a list of five everyday jobs that someone else could do after the baby comes, and ask one person to take one.

Add it to your day

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