Four friends of different ages walking arm in arm along a stone street at dusk, one carrying flowers

Together · 20 min

Bringing your birth partner in

Help the person who will be with you understand their part: appointments, the plan, and who to call if something feels wrong.

20 minutesFrom the library, free to readFour steps

A birth partner, whether a partner, friend, relative or doula, can make a big difference on the day. But many feel unsure of what they are supposed to do. A little shared preparation helps them feel useful and helps you feel supported.

The steps

Four small steps,in your own time.

  1. Ask your birth partner to come to at least one appointment or class with you, if you would like that and they can.

  2. Share your page of what matters for the birth, your important numbers, and where the bag is.

  3. Ask your midwife to tell both of you which signs mean you should call the maternity team straight away, and write them on the numbers sheet.

  4. Agree a few things your birth partner can do on the day: speak up for you, keep track of time, handle calls and messages, bring snacks and water.

The reason

Why it helps

A birth partner who knows the plan and the numbers can act quickly and calmly. Hearing advice from the midwife directly means it comes from the right person. Giving them clear jobs helps them feel included rather than standing by.

A gentle variation

If you do not have a birth partner, ask your midwife what support is available, and think about a friend who could be on call. If your birth partner has other responsibilities, such as caring for someone else, agree a backup person now.

One hand resting over another on a wooden table

WE · TRIBE

Try itwith someone.

Sit down with your birth partner this week and go through your numbers sheet together.

Try it today

This week, ask your birth partner to come to your next appointment or to read through your notes with you.

Add it to your day

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