Pets · 15 min
When a pet has died
Grief for an animal is real grief, and a small, chosen way to say goodbye can help a household begin to carry it.
Losing an animal can hurt as much as losing a person, and it is often met with less understanding. The home suddenly feels different: the bowl, the bed, the empty spot by the door. Giving the loss some room, rather than hurrying past it, can help.
The steps
Four small steps,in your own time.
Let yourself grieve. Tell one or two people who will understand that your animal has died, and that you are sad.
Choose a small way to mark their life: plant something, look through photos, write down the memories you most want to keep, keep their collar.
Decide, in your own time, what to do with their bed, bowls and toys. There is no right time to put them away.
If there are children in the home, tell them simply and honestly what has happened, using clear words like "died", and let them ask questions and join in the goodbye.
The reason
Why it helps
Marking a loss gives it a place, and can help grief move rather than stay stuck. Clear, honest words help children understand, and being included helps them feel less alone. Talking with people who understand can make the sadness easier to carry.
A gentle variation
If your animal died suddenly, or after a hard decision, you may feel guilt as well as grief. It can help to talk it through with your vet, who can answer questions about what happened. Some vets and animal welfare groups offer pet bereavement support lines.
WE · TRIBE
Try itwith someone.
Gather the household and share a story each about the animal, or look at photos together. If you live alone, call a friend who knew your animal and share one memory.
Try it today
Today, write down one memory of your animal you want to keep, or share it with someone who knew them.
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